Thanksgiving 2009

Things that went right today:

1) Yummy buffet dinner at the Hyatt with the family

2) Family movie date to see the new "Christmas carol" movie with Jim Carrey. It was amazing.

3) Went further than ever running today without stopping.

Ok so what would a blog about thankfulness be without a post on thanksgiving day? I find it heartwarming that our nation has a holiday dedicated to reaching out to loved ones and counting our blessings. It makes us better people to stop and reflect formally each year on all that we are grateful for doesn't it? And Thanksgiving sets such a wonderful tone for the upcoming season where we will collectively celebrate the birth and life of our Savior Jesus Christ. It puts us in a charitable frame of mind. And a humble one. We are filled with greater love for others as we gather together to celebrate and share our abundance one with another.

I am reminded today as I relax and feast with my family that there are many who are still hard at work. Devoted individuals who have chosen public service professions that do not allow for days off. Today as I slept in there were firefighters showing up early at the firehouse. As I lounged on the couch cuddling with my kids there were police officers out on patrol. As I enjoyed a lovely meal there were doctors and nurses caring for those in the hospital who needed their skills on this day. Today as my family laughed and played together there were soldiers in far away places, often dangerous ones, who were longing for their families too. Today I am thankful for the steadfast hardworking people who provide comfort and safety in our communities every day. Even on weekends and holidays. I thank them today from the bottom of my heart.

fines

Things That Went Right Today:

1) got an early start on some Christmas shopping

2) cleared up my library account

3) yummy leftovers for lunch instead of the usual sandwich

Ok so I admit it. I skipped out on library fines. When we moved away from Ashburn suddenly last spring I had an overdue library book. "Frankenstein" by Mary Shelley. I had not had the chance to read it yet, and with the frantic nature of our move a trip to the library to return it was not on the agenda. I figured I would deal with it once the move was over. But the trouble is that the book got stuck in a box and I did not know which one. It sat in a box all summer and when it became clear that we would be moving back to Ashburn in the Fall I left the boxed items alone and planned to sort things through once we got to the new house. In the back of my mind though I felt guilt. I knew that library book was in there racking up fines and fees right? Fast forward to Fall and the move. We hauled the boxes over, but only unpacked the ones we most needed. After so much moving we just ran out of steam and there still are many unpacked boxes in my garage as we speak. Every now and then that book would sneak into my mind and pangs of guilt would hit, but I would quickly shoo those thoughts away. Well I tried anyway, but you can't run away from your own mind. I knew I should go take care of it. I knew that odds were it would be a very long time if ever before that book resurfaced. But I was worried that the fines were super high after so much time. More than that I pictured a very stern librarian scolding me for my delinquency. My solution? Just never go to the library again. Problem solved. NOT! I felt like a fugitive every time I drove past. Ducking and hiding...from whom I don't know. It's not like they know me personally there, but still. A few times for book club I wanted to go and check out a book but convinced myself that I couldn't. I kept faking my head out with the notion that I would unpack a dozen boxes to find the book again, but never did. Finally it happened. A book I needed was not at the bookstore. I had to go to the library. Gasp! Time to face the music, so I dragged my trembling self down there. I took a deep breath and told the librarian my sad story. I cringed waiting for her scorn, but oddly, she smiled at me and said it was no trouble at all. I emphasized to her the magnitude of my tardiness and asked how severe the fine was. Again she smiled and informed me that in Loudoun County they no longer issue fines for overdue books. If a book was late you simply could not check out another one until the book was returned or paid for if lost. What??? No fine? Really? After 6 months? Could it be real? Again I bravely asked what the replacement fee was for the book...fearing the worst. She smiled again and told me that since it was an older paperback the fee was only $3.95 to cover the book. I happily paid the money and then cautiously asked if I would ever be allowed to check out books here again after my past behavior. This time she laughed and said that I most assuredly could. I skipped over to the shelves with a lighter step and demeanor than I had walked in with and discovered that they did not have the book club book I needed. So what did I check out instead? Why "Frankenstein" by, Mary Shelley of course. They had two other copies on the shelf. But now I felt less like the monster in the book and more like myself again. Only $3.95 to unload that burden? I can't help but marvel how easy it was to fix a problem once I set out to do it. I had made it bigger and scarier in my mind than it actually was and held myself back for such a long time for no good reason. Today I am grateful for a kind librarian and the chance to clear my good name for only $3.95. I will carry this lesson with me in my heart for the next time I feel I have something I need to clear up...no matter what it may be. Probably it will be easier to fix than I initially fear, and it is worth paying any price to have a clean conscience.

Fresh Shower

Things that went right today:

1) weight still coming off!

2) found out another niece or nephew is on the way

3) Holiday decorations in the stores...almost time for Christmas

I have a bottle of Tilex Fresh Shower in my shower. What a handy product! If you spray it around in there after you shower it fights the mold and mildew and eliminates or lessens the need to scrub the grout and ick. You still have to clean I guess, but far less often. So taking a minute to remember to do the maintenance each day means I avoid being assaulted with noxious fumes from the stronger stuff and don't have to breathe in mold spores or slip on slime? Pretty good deal and well worth the daily effort. In my old house the mold had already integrated itself so completely into the shower that it was a constant battle. I could practically kill myself cleaning it and it would be back within days. Sometimes I swear it was laughing at me. Very discouraging. So in this house I intend to not let it ever get to that point. Zap that Fresh Shower around every day and never let the mold gain a stronghold and I know I shall prevail. Take THAT mold and mildew!

I was thinking today how this same principle applies to so many areas of our lives. A little daily maintenance can help us prevent greater troubles down the road.

-Exercise...I am currently struggling with this one. I used to be in such great shape. Trim and fit. Life, a thyroid condition and childbearing (and to be honest some laziness too) had ballooned me to an unhealthy weight and I was always tired and often depressed. 6 months ago I got up off my tail and starting working out again only to discover that I was in far worse shape than I had realized and it was really really really hard to get moving again. I am improving daily and losing weight steadily, but it has been painful climbing back up the fitness mountain let me tell you. Wishing now that I had never let it go that far. If I had maintained the body that I had better with daily exercise and eating habits, I could have been healthier and more energetic all those years and would not have to be paying this price. Not that it can't be fixed. It is just much harder now. But I have learned my lesson well. Once I reach my goals I vow to keep it up. I never want to have to go through this again. Maintenance will be easier in the long run for sure.

-Housework- if you get it out, put it away...make a mess, clean it up. Just regular basic picking up after ourselves can feel tedious at times but think of what happens when we don't. Before long the clutter takes over the house and the job of cleaning it up takes more time than we have. It can easily become so overwhelming that we get discouraged and embarrassed to have people over even. So much easier to organize yourself and STAY that way. Easier said than done, but the principle remains true. Daily maintenance saves the day. As much as I don't feel like rinsing the dishes and want to dump them in the sink and go watch TV, the job of scraping the food that has hardened on there the next day is far less pleasant. May as well take a minute to run water over them today so I don't need a sandblaster tomorrow right?

-Schoolwork or office work or bills...whatever...If we take bites out of these tasks daily when they are not urgent, we can usually keep on a pretty steady schedule. Wait and you face an all nighter and shoddy work done while panicky and tired. Or worse we let people down or miss deadlines altogether. Why do we do that to ourselves?

-Relationships- taking the time to connect with someone every day, or at least regularly can keep a relationship alive and healthy. Neglecting that can leave us distant and out of touch. Often it is very hard to revive a relationship that has gone cold. If you love someone, make it a priority to maintain that relationship. Talk to them, touch them, take an interest in their lives and share your highs and lows with them too. Stay close...it is more rewarding than being together but far apart. This is worthy of every bit of energy we can put into it. What else is more important than our loved ones after all?

-Spiritual strength...daily maintenance in the form of prayer or scripture study or service or meditation can keep our spirits in tune and at peace. When we let life overtake us and these things get put on the back burner we can watch our characters erode and our countenances change. So let's put first things first shall we?

Most of us get this principle when it comes to personal hygiene because the result or damage is manifested so immediately. If we stop brushing our teeth or showering regularly or brushing our hair we feel nasty, look greasy and become distinctly less popular in crowds. So pretty much every day no matter what we take care of this essential body maintenance. Even when we are busy or tired or sick we still brush our teeth. (ok I guess not everyone does...you know who you are) In other areas of our lives the neglect is often not seen so readily or quickly though. We can dig ourselves in pretty deep before we realize it if we are not careful and diligent. Today I am grateful to Tilex for creating Fresh Shower to assist me in my war against mildew, and I am grateful that when I pick it up to spray it every day it will remind me of other areas of my life that I need to give some attention to as well.

Stuff

Things that went right today:

1) Got to have lunch with my daughter and son at the elementary school

2) Family movie night

3) Finally cleaned out the laundry room so we can walk in there

Random stuff to be thankful for:

-q-tips...thanks to this convenient little tool, gone is the plight of uncontrolled earwax.

-microwaves...just think of it. No more endless waits for culinary satisfaction. Press a button and presto it is done. 30 seconds to gluttony is bliss.

-toilet paper: This goes without saying. I am sooooo grateful to have been born AFTER it was invented. Same goes for disposable diapers and baby wipes. I mean really now...can you imagine what it must have been like?

-airplanes: How truly awesome is that that we can actually fly? It still defies logic to me, but makes me so happy that I can live thousands of miles away and still see my family in a day's trip. To think that we actually complain about the hassles of airline travel? Compared to the alternatives it is a breeze.

-cordless telephones: We are no longer bound by the length of the phone cord and can now multitask so much more effectively. While chatting with friends we can change diapers, do dishes, walk from room to room. No more cord tangles that require holding the phone down to let it unwind. Huge time saver there.

-washing machines: Um...washboard? No way! I would never have clean clothes for my family if I had to use more primative tools. I shudder to think how we would all smell?

-deodorant: This goes along with the previous question. Yikes! Yes this is a very very good thing.

-copy machines: No more purple fingers and sore arms from the old mimeograph machines. Sing hallelujah.

-post it notes: The ultimate handy little helpers. So versatile. How did I ever organize myself without them?

-bottled water: Even though on the one hand I find it offensive to pay that much for...well...water. Still it is great to be able to keep it on hand wherever you go and stay adequately hydrated even with the busiest of schedules.

-high powered shower heads: Ah yes. The perfect morning pampering pick me up.

-digital photography: Even amateurs like me can look like I know what I am doing. Isn't that wonderful?

There are so many crazy little things that bless our lives each day. Most that we totally take for granted. So many of the conveniences we have today did not exist for our grandparents. Or even in our own childhoods. But yet they have become so much of daily living that we hardly take notice of how amazing they are anymore. When I was a kid I could not have even begun to conceive of something like the internet. But these days I practically could not survive without it. I am grateful today to have been born in the time and place that I was so I can take advantage of so many ingenious devices. Take a minute to look around you and notice things large and small that you utilize every day that make daily living just that much easier. It is really remarkable when you take the time to think things through. We are truly blessed.

Top Sheets

Things that went right today:

1) Cleaned my bedroom thoroughly. Peaceful retreat achieved.

2) 19 year old son turns in his mission paperwork tonight.

3) 17 year old cooking dinner tonight.

We have had at least one set of bunk beds in our home for the past 13 years. In all of this time I have found changing the sheets on the top bunk annoying to say the least. Let me tell you how it is done. To begin with, unless you are Kareem Abdul Jabbar, you cannot make up the upper bed with your feet on the ground. You have to climb up there. Now these beds are intended for small children to use typically so they are built with that in mind. The stair rails are not meant to accommodate full sized feet and the bars are just slightly too close together for comfort. So it is a bit of an acrobatics act to haul yourself to the top. Especially while carrying a full load of bedding, so it is best to toss them up there in advance if you think of it (this does however make the next steps harder if you have a huge pile of linens in your way, but it is that or climb up and down several times. Take your pick). Once up there though you again feel oversized. No way to easily maneuver with the ceiling directly above you forcing you into a kneeling and crouched position. Invariably you will hit your head at some point. It's a given. Now the bottom sheet is the easiest. I have learned to start at the top left corner. Scrunch the sheet up in front of you so you are not kneeling on it and find the corner. Then shove your hand as far down the inside of the upper bed frame as you can with sheet in hand. You won't be able to see what you are doing because they build these beds high on the top so the child does not fall out. This design works beautifully for all but sheet changing. But persevere and paw around some and you can match the corner of the bed to the sheet corner and then pull it until it catches. If you can hook it over the edge than you are golden! Because it is gathered, it will kindly hold itself in place while you move around to the upper right corner. (Be careful to make sure it is fully hooked on though or it will spring back at you as soon as your turn your back on it.) The next corner should easily install unless you accidentally started with the wrong corner to begin with and the sheet is going the wrong direction. In this case you must reorient yourself and repeat step one. But assuming you have successfully put the first two corners on, then you have to manage to turn your body around and get the sheet shifted back under you (don't forget how close the ceiling is now) and then shimmy it over to the other side to put it over the other two corners. Phew. Now it is time for the top sheet. Pretty easy to spread it out but tucking it in is always a problem. In order to do so you must lift the corner of the mattress out from the extra deep frame. Not a problem in theory except for the fact that you are sitting up there. The full weight of your body is working against what you are trying to do. Bear in mind you are also trying NOT to fall off of the bed. Or to hit your head (again). Once the top sheet is on it is time for the blanket. Same story here but with a thicker heavier fabric. Sometimes I try to be quicker and do them both at once but it never really works out very well. They seem to shift around up there while you are working, refusing to stay where you need them to be. The comforter goes on last. By this time you are sweaty and exhausted and your back hurts but throw the sucker on there haphazardly anyway. Then risk your life climbing back DOWN from the blasted thing and then do a little scoot dance along the side of the bed trying to keep balance on the bottom rail on your tip toes while straightening the wrinkles out of the comforter. DONE. Then go see your chiropractor.

I have repeated this crazy process countless times over the years...feeling frustrated and irritable every single time. More so the older and less limber I become. I usually end up with at least one bruise. Today though, a light went on in my head. I finally asked myself, "is there a better way?" Not sure why it never occurred to me to think about alternatives before. Maybe because that way just the way you made a bed right? It was how my Mom did it. How her Mom did it. How I had always done it. Another way? Impossible right? But you know what? In about 15 seconds of pondering an important truth was staring me in the face. That this was a kid's room. The owner of this bed was 8 year old boy who could care less how it looked. From the ground you could NOT see if the bed was wrinkle free or not. I had been working hard to smooth out the comforter for all of these years...and for what? The benefit of the ceiling? Or the stuffed bear that lives up there? Even my son never really saw the smooth surface because once he climbed up he had to crawl across the bed to get to his pillow. By the time he noticed it was wrinkled again. sigh. I spent another 15 seconds feeling sorry for myself for all of the time I had wasted over the years and then decided to let it go and move on. But that first realization was very liberating. I felt free now to ask myself how else I could streamline the process. The bottom sheet was mandatory to protect the mattress. So no options there. But what about the blanket and top sheet? Did you really need them after all? Truth is that usually when I stripped the bed on laundry day the sheet and blanket were shoved down at the very bottom of the bed anyway. He had not really even been using them, because it got too hot up there with all of that over him. So for all intents and purposes the comforter was all he had been using. So I had a crazy thought. How about not putting them on at all? How about just putting on the bottom sheet and the comforter? And how about just laying the comforter out up there rather than worrying over tucking it in all the way around? Scandalous I know. What kind of a mom would not use a full set of sheets for their beloved child right? Um...it took about another 15 seconds to decide this was not the measure of a good mother. In fact it made good solid sense. Just wash the comforter more often and it's all good. The bed now took less than half the time to make. No injuries and a happy mommy at the end of it. And that night my son slept as peacefully as ever. The sky did not fall even. In 45 seconds I solved a problem that had been plaguing me for over a decade. Such a simple solution really but somehow I overlooked it for ages. Why I wonder? Now I am examining everything with a new resolve to find simple solutions to complex problems. What other irritants in my life can be easily fixed? Where can a little creativity go a long way?

- The sock matching issue that is the constant battle in a large family. (where do those socks go anyway?) Rather than try to match them all, get a big basket and toss them all in. Let the kids dig for matches when they need them.

- Never can find the case to match the DVD up with? Get a binder with CD dividers and put them in there. No more searching for cases.

- Baby taking off diaper? Duct tape!

You get the idea right? This is not rocket science and most solutions seem so obvious once you think of them. Just takes stepping back from a situation and looking at it with an open mind. Not putting limits on your ideas based on tradition or worries over what others might think. Today I am grateful that I no longer feel bound by top sheets. What can I tackle next?

Stop Look and Listen

Things that went right today:

1) Finally got the piano tuned again. Sounds much better now.

2) Feeling so organized. Got my menus planned for two weeks in advance.

3) Going to a movie with my husband later. Something to look forward to all day.

Remember as a kid the police officers that would often come to school to teach safety lessons? We learned about stranger danger, wearing bicycle helmets (even though no one actually ever wore them back then), and were instructed on how to safely cross a street. We were never to just run out into the road. They told us to "Stop, Look, and Listen" before crossing. This catch phrase has stayed in my mind all of these years and I have used it in teaching my own children. Stop and at the curb, look both ways and listen for the sounds of cars to make sure you stay safe and your pathway ahead is clear. Then you may proceed with confidence. If you fail to do this than you might get hit by a car and be badly hurt or even killed, so this principle is drilled into us on numerous occasions. And it seems to have worked so far. For 41 years now I have successfully managed to avoid being struck by oncoming traffic at intersections. Yeah for me!!!

"Stop, Look and Listen" can also come in handy in avoiding crashes of another variety. The emotional kind that come with names like anxiety, depression, anger and apathy. States of being that can cause us to feel almost as beat up on the inside as a car wreck makes us feel on the outside. I am becoming more convinced with every passing day that gratitude is the secret to a light carefree spirit and a happy heart. "Stop, Look and Listen" can help us greatly increase our gratitude quotient. Think about it. It can apply in so many ways. Just right now in flash from my desk chair I can use this. Stop writing for a moment. Just breathe deeply and look around me. What do I see? To the left I have a view of a lovely tree all decked out in fall splendor. A few colored leaves are falling gently in the breeze. Light is streaming in the window. Directly in front of me I see my blog which is helping me learn so much about myself and the telephone reminding me of my long conversation with my best friend in Italy this morning. It was so fun to chat with her and catch up on news and share thoughts and ideas with each other. I miss her a lot but love when we have a chance to talk like that. I see a package of photos taken on my cruise while snorkling. My daughter and I had so much fun on that trip and were fascinated by the exotic sea life we saw. There's a paper from the school with information about my son's graduation in June. I am so proud of him and the responsible, hard working young man he is. My daughter's school photos are right here too. What a beauty she is. More so the older she gets. It takes my breath away to see her growing up so fast. There is the pineapple lotion bought on my recent trip to Hawaii. Now those are great memories of fun in the sun. To my right my cute little boys are playing quietly (this is rare...the quietly part...so I am enjoying it immensely) They are being such sweet little buddies (this also could end at any minute and turn into a screaming match so I am soaking it in with a smile and loving it). I also notice that someone has colored on the wall but I will skim over that for right now. :-) Behind me are two pots of pretty yellow flowers that I bought for an object lesson the other day. They are such cheerful little plants. Brings me joy to have them blooming there. Through the sliding glass door I see my two big dogs running and playing and I see my hammock swaying, beckoning me for a future nap. If I listen closely what do I hear? My little ones giggling and chattering together. My puppy snoring peacefully nearby. The dishwasher humming, accomplishing that arduous task for me. Some birds singing outside rejoicing in this beautiful day we are sharing. It does my heart good to just pause now and then and drink in the moment. Count my blessings. Release the stress and embrace the positive energy of what is happening right this minute. I am suddenly filled with gratitude for all of the wonderful things in my life. In spite of whatever worries might be nagging at me I have so many things to be happy about. We all do. Taking time to notice and acknowledge them is the important thing. Let's kick negative thoughts off of center stage and give the spotlight to joy and wonder. And thankfulness. It's so easy to do - even from my desk chair in just a minute or two. But what if we really make this a priority? How powerful could that be? What if we started to more deliberately "Stop, Look and Listen" in our relationships? To pay more careful attention to the people we love. We could discover new things about them we did not know. Perhaps a talent they possess or a struggle we did not understand. We could spend more time talking to them and enjoy their wit and humor. We might learn of their needs and how we can better help them learn and grow. We might become aware of mistakes we are making in the relationship and how we can improve. We would less frequently miss opportunities to show love and share laughter. How about if we applied "Stop, Look and Listen" to spiritual things? Maybe to our relationship with God or to communing with nature...to whatever helps us personally find our spiritual center. Seems to follow that we would flourish more in that area as well and find comfort and peace for our souls. You could apply this to almost anything really and in most cases I think the reward would be greater understanding, connection, contentment and gratitude. Filled with those positive attributes and energies we are then able to cross with confidence safely to whatever new challenges lie ahead on the other side. "Stop, Look and Listen"...good advice to follow. Helps protect us from getting hurt and clears our paths forward. And it's really fun too so enjoy!!!

Space

Things that went right today:

1) Getting all of the "return from vacation" laundry done

2) Wearing a brand new sweater that I really like

3) Gorgeous sunny day and fall leaves

Last week while in Hawaii I was able to make the trek up to the top of Mauna Kea. We were up at approximately 13,800 feet elevation, above the clouds and seemingly on top of the world. The climate conditions on Mauna Kea make it very well suited for telescopes so some of the most advanced telescopes, cameras and observatories in the world are found there. As part of the trip we had the privilege of watching the sunset from the summit. What an incredible sight it was. We then went to an open clearing and our guide set up some amateur but still quite advanced telescopes for us. He told us a lot about the different stars we were seeing and set the sites for us to see some amazing things. We saw a distant galaxy, a star cluster, the moons of Jupiter and various other wonders that ended with an amazing view of the moon. It was beautiful. We could see all of the valleys and craters and such. Even without the scope we could look up into the sky that night and it was so clear. We could see the outline of the Milky Way and many thousands of stars. I could not help but feel very small in relation to the vastness of space. To realize that all of the things I do every day and all of the troubles I see around me are actually rather insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Not to say that they are not important. They are in my own personal realm of course. But I am grateful today to have had that perspective at least. To sense the majesty of the universe and the presence of God in the heavens. No matter what else happens today the sun will still set. The earth will still turn on it's axis. Greater forces will still continue to be in control. I can live in peace and know that all will be well.